Sing! Or Tips on How to Survive Karaoke from a Filipino Perspective
One of the reasons why I don’t have my
karaoke song is because I have not found the right fit for me. The process of finding one is like
marriage. It takes time to figure out
your soul mate before you can actually commit.
Technically, eloping is not an option if we are comparing karaoke to
getting hitched. You need to go through
the process of a very long engagement. Committing
to a song is hard. You have to have the
right ingredients to make sure that whatever comes out of your vocal cords is palatable
to all parties that will have to endure your mini-concert.
Karaoke, according to Wikipedia, is a type
of dining interactive entertainment or video game developed in Japan in which
an amateur singer sings along with recorded music using a microphone. The music
is normally an instrumental version of a well-known popular song.
When I was growing back in the 80’s, a
karaoke was a big chunk of machine made of wood with switches and speakers. Typically, you would insert a cassette tape, specifically
a Multiplex tape, to be able to play a song.
Once it started playing, you could control the track based on your
singing needs: when you turned the knob to the left it would only play the instrumental
music, to the right: the vocals, and when the knob was in the middle, it would
play both. I always marveled at this
ingenious instrument because this was how I learned to sing tons of Christmas
Carols, even the most obscure ones, like the Christmas Alphabet, and I
also learned the theme to Karate Kid by heart.
When the video format of karaoke came into
being, I want to say that the manufacturers decided to baptize the new gadget
as Videoke- to distinguish it from the Karaoke we used to know. At least
that was the case in the Philippines.
Now, here in the US, Videoke is not a common
term. It became the secret lingo for
singing cheesy songs using a smart microphone among Filipinos during “lumpia
parties”, in other words, birthday celebrations for non-singing commoners.
For the sake of argument, let’s just call it in its truest and general term-
karaoke.
I should start to make considerations for my
own go-to song because there is a lot of pressure to sing live at an event
where all the guests are your relatives and everyone is referred to as Titos
and Titas.
If I sing for an international audience
(i.e. my English speaking co-workers), I should have a set of criteria in
choosing the perfect performance piece so my “talent portion” will be a hit
among the crowd.
But how do you succeed in singing in
public? Here are some of my personal
tips, based on experience on the Karaoke parties I have been to that I would
like to share. This is by no means a
professional advice because I am in no position to be the authority in singing. I just belt out in the shower most of the
time. That’s how professional I can get,
so take everything with a grain of salt (and a shot of Margarita).
Hold on to your mics because it’s the Grammy
Awards or bust.
1. The song should be familiar to everyone.
You should know your audience. For the Filipino crowd, any song that would
equal the aforementioned My Way by
Frank Sinatra should be a sure fire hit to pump up the crowd. Most Pinoys have a wide range of repertoire
and they can identify even the oldest melodies that are on the selection. Sometimes, we can even belt out foreign
language songs even without knowing the meaning behind them.
If you sing with co-workers, it should be
in the vein of Britney, Missy, Run DMC or Bruno Mars.
But if you pick one song that will be a hit
for everyone- you can never go wrong with ABBA.
The group transcends generations.
I think everybody starts writhing even with just the opening chords of Dancing
Queen. Then there is also Don’t
Stop Believin’ by Journey, when everyone would lose their s*it once you
hear the first three notes of the song: doesn’t matter if you give justice to
it or not, what’s important is that you make the crowd go wild.
2.
Pick a song that you can actually sing.
I always fail in this category. I like a song and I will actually sing it
very well in my head but when I reach a particular point in it, I will
encounter a high E, which is well beyond my range and end up duplicating my Impossible
Dream moment when I was in 6th grade. Let’s just say I did an off-off-off-off-off-falsetto
that was reminiscent of being on the verge of adulthood but not quite there
yet.
Which leads me to the next point.
3. If
you reach a part in the song where you realize you cannot hit that high note,
point the microphone to your audience so they can sing it for you.
Never fails. Even professionals do this. Just look at Mariah’s performance during the
2019 New Year’s Eve Ball drop: she did not sing, she just tried being
cute. Moral of the story: it’s better to
be cute than to be embarrassing.
4. Audience participation can help you make
coins.
There are songs that are meant to bring
your crowd on their feet and make you become a stellar performer and then there
are songs that are just pure classic fun.
The songs previously mentioned above come to mind. Then there is also Sweet Caroline which
an audience participation is a given.
Never has the words “Pam-pam-pam” brought excitement to drunk singers
until Bone Thugs’ Crossroads came along.
5.
Practice makes perfect.
This is a no brainer. Even our church choir, who sing the same
songs week after week, year after year, and holiday after holiday, practice.
NBA superstars practice. Manny
Pacquiao practices. Me, an amateur, has
no excuse to at least vocalize and make a veiled attempt at practicing even for
the most mundane song like Aqua’s Barbie Girl.
6. Either you can be a good singer, a good
performer or a great comedian.
Just like in a
sporting event, you should know your strengths and weaknesses. Not all voices are created equal. One can be blessed with the voice like Sarah
Brightman but not that very pleasant to stare at. Or one can be as a talented songwriter as
Adele but with a voice of questionable certainty, say Marge Simpson’s twin
sisters. If you know your capability as
a singer, then stick to what you can sing.
If not, make people laugh. The audience adores funny people. And they forgive mediocre singing if they are
having fun. If you are not good with
comedy, it’s really time to bust the moves and boots the house down.
7. Push the mike away from you
Again, if you
reach a high point in the song, meaning that is totally out of your voice range,
push that mike away from your face and pretend that your voice fades slowly as
the notes get higher. People will think
you were able to hit that note, but they didn’t hear it because the microphone
was too far. Close your eyes for
additional drama. Then wait for the
applause.
8. Cover one ear
with a finger. And do it with effort and
grace.
This should go
with number 7. The more feeling you put
in a song the more people will believe that you are really trying hard to give
justice to it. If your voice turns out
sour, people might just mistake your gesture as making fun of yourself, which
also works in your favor.
9. Hydrate.
Parties like
these involve a lot of drinking. When
it’s your turn take control of the microphone, you are probably too drunk to be
entertaining, hence the need for hydration.
Of course, water helps your voice so that you don’t sound raspy or like
you just had your thyroid removed. So
drink your water.
10. If
all else fails, just sing.
We are not trying to seal a recording deal here. We are just trying to have fun. So, if someone tells you to stick to dancing,
sing louder! At the top of your lungs. Like there is no tomorrow. And like no
one is listening to you! Nobody can
dictate what songs you can sing or how you can sing it. If you close your eyes and believe you’re
great, it will sound good, probably like the way I imagined Impossible Dream
sounded like when I tried singing the last note during my 6th grade
performance: perfect, melodic, dramatic and a total winner without any
hitch.
Go sing for yourself. Sing with your heart. After all, it’s your stage to conquer, not
theirs.
April
19, 2022
Copyright June 2022
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